Make believe…
Originally posted: May 31, 2008
Let’s pretend
we’re an old
married couple,
Still in love and
still liking each other.
We know the
sweet spots
and the soft spots.
We can still find
the hot spots.
I’ll cook your
favorite dinner.
We’ll watch a
favorite movie.
…what do you mean,
it’s getting late?
When did you join
a bowling league?
After 41 years I can attest that this is the most important part:
“…still liking each other.”
It takes time to understand this and there’s no way to know how much time.
Time, in which it seems, not many people are willing to invest.
Here’s Charlie Anderson’s take on it when Lt Sam asks him for his daughter Jenny’s hand in marriage:
This is from the movie Shenandoah, 1966, starring James Stewart, set in the Civil War years, and well worth the view.
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0059711/
In Shenandoah, Virginia, widower farmer Charlie Anderson lives a peaceful life with his six sons – Jacob, James, Nathan, John, Henry and Boy, his daughter Jennie, and his daughter-in-law and James’ wife Ann Anderson. Charlie does not let his sons join the army to fight in the Civil War that he does not consider their war. Jennie marries her beloved Lieutenant Sam, but they do not have a honeymoon since Sam has to return to the front. Charlie’s youngest son Boy is mistakenly taken prisoner by soldiers from the North so Charlie rides with his sons to rescue Boy, while James and Ann stay on the farm. It is time of violence and war, and tragedy reaches the Anderson family.
Ghost…wishing you many more years of time.
It’s just the best when we don’t have to pretend.
As always Jean you have a way with words.
thank you, SK. I don’t think pretending ever works no matter how hard we try.
Congrats Ghost. You are right about the importance of still liking your spouse.
My wife and I celebrated our 50th wedding anniversary a couple months ago. Our daughter and her husband organized a surprise party for us with family from both sides and friends. We had a great time. We still have some of the balloons from it and whenever I say “Happy Anniversary” to her, at unexpected times, she smiles and we reminisce about the fun we had.
We are not wealthy, nor are we retired, but we are closer now to each other than we were in our younger years. I notice that we are becoming more like each other. I also notice that we each listen to one another more than we did in the past. We’ve endured hardships and still have challenges before us but we enjoy each other and still make one another laugh, sometimes heartily. And we make up silly songs and sing them together (but no one else has ever heard any of them or ever will!)
At 80, in light of friends and family who have gone on to their reward, I realize more of what an old high school classmate means when she signs off on her emails with: “Every Day is a Gift.”
Walt